2012 Michigan fishing

Never too Late to Learn or Laugh at Fish Camp

Day1

 The first day on our fishing adventure,  the plan was to take my boat up to my dads at lake leelanaue rv park , drop it off, head to their salmon fishing camp; at twin oaks camp ground, set up camp, and get to the river. For starters I would like to add we both thought about leaving the boat at Twin Oaks and maybe use it during the day but were unsure on the boat being able to be used and how safe it would be; so the boats dropped off, we got checked in to Twin Oaks, tent set up, and cots and it looked like we really were regular campers so  we headed to the river not really knowing what we were doing or where we were really going. We started fishing about 5 or 6 o'clock and I think we each  caught two or three fish. Not bad but not great. All and all we both thought it was cool and headed back to camp tired and wore out from the traveling and getting up about four in the morning. It was probably about 45 degrees that night so no fire and the tent was not bad... nice and cool, other than being a fat guy trying to sleep on a cot probably made for taking kids camping and not an average adult let alone a three hundred pound man. 

Day 2 



After a fist full of ibuprofin and some breakfast, that my fishing partner whipped up on his camp stove that at first looked alot like a can of Alpo dog food and some eggs, we headed for the river. The morning bit was not great, a few bites but very underwhelming. The evening bit we each caught 3 or 4, cleaned the fish at the fish cleaning station, and hit the shower trying to warm up. It was probably midnight to one in the morning. It was fairly cold and being wet from the river didn't help. The feeling of being cold to the core made my fishing partner get out his buddy heater. He tried over and over again to fire it up but with no avail and I headed to take a hot shower. Being satisfied with a warm shower and the water pressure of a old man with prostate trouble, I was pretty sure my back up heat was going to be a god send I had a 12 volt electric blanket that i was plugging in to a power source that we left in the tent. We gave up on the tent heater and just hit the cots hoping for the best as it seemed to be getting colder and colder out. My phone said 34 degrees out. My partner being the camping guru had a camping sleeping bag and was fine chilly but fine. Meanwhile me in my sleeping bag that I'm sure was bought for my daughter for a slumber party and my 12 volt tailgating eclectic blanket. The electric blanket worked so well I was holding my hand on the blanket wondering and asking myself, "Is this gd thing on? Is it working at all?" I was pretty much froze on my tiny borrowed cot. The whole night thinking one what the hell am i doing?  and two wondering whether or not this damn blanket was working. I was checking my phone every 3 minutes hoping for the morning to get here. I know I fell asleep once at least because I woke up with my head and my arm outside of the tiny electric blanket. My arm was so cold I think I heard cracking as I pulled it back in under the tiny blanket. Tired, cold, and I'm sure kinda bitchy, we both tried to get a fire going and do what ever we could to warm up. My buddy went back to the tent and layed on his cot not getting much sleep his self on his tiny cot with his fancy twenty year old camping sleeping bag. In about two minutes of trying to get a nap he fell Thru it. The metal frame broke. So now we are one cot down. I'm guessing the cot was as miserable as we were and  it killed itself. Either that or it missed its friend the buddy heater who had passed away early that evening. But on the good side we both knew that a horse trailer with two  more fisherman and a furnace was on its way. So knowing that was going to be our last night in the tent and on the tiny cots we were way to excited for a horse trailer to show up. That was pretty much one of the most miserable nights I had ever spent. haha. I can laugh about it now but wow I'm definitely  spoiled with camping in my dads trailer with the furnace and the cable tv.

Day 3

 My camp conisoure fishing partner did most the cooking. We ate mostly from cans and he whipped up breakfast that morning of some hash and eggs. Looked alot like Alpo and eggs but being cold tired and hungry, it was actually pretty good.

 We drove around and hit a few spots, not catching anything.We starting talking to an older lady wearing knee boots and carrying a fishing pole . the lady I'm guessing was in her seventy's. i asked her how they were biting and she said that she only caught two but her brother in-law and her uncle had did better than her ? at that point the only thing i could think of was , holly hell how old the uncle?we later  Found a place we could have launched the boat and fished from a boat, which made us both cuss for taking it to dads.

  We waited around for the horse trailer and our other fisherman almost wanting to throw a ticker tape parade as the pulled in. We set up camp that night about midnight and headed for the river. That night I think all four of us got 4 or 5 fish after fishing for a few hours and cleaning fish for a couple hours it was getting light out as we climbed into the trailer and slept for a few hours. Best night of sleep ever.

Day 4

Drove around with the horse trailer twins checking out the area and doing our best to kill the better part of a couple cases of beer. Hanging out at the camp with my fishing partners cooking skills upgraded tremendously with a larger array of chow while waiting around camp the neighboring loud mouth camper came over to tell us how he was the greatest fisherman possible in the river and maybe the world. He could tell the type of rock his bait was dragging across just by feel, and as I was refilling my tackle box with jigs, the drunk neighbor said he wanted no part of those outlaw lead sling er type guys and stumbled away, after his Buddy's from his camp hollered over to tell him to leave us alone and stop talking on his gay blue tooth phone thing. That night fishing was not the greatest night. Toward the end of the night the horse trailer twin one was helping my fishing partner net a fish and the fish went under the net  swimming between his legs and hooking his waders, hooking his leg, and tearing his waders, in the center of the fast moving river at one in the morning. Twin number two had caught his limit and was already at the truck. My partner and twin one headed for the bank and i lugged behind only having four fish still looking for number five. I made it almost to the bank and my right foot stepped in what felt like a deep hole, so there I sat on my left foot right one in a hole I'm thinking possibly broken and I cant get up. The only way is to lay forward and basically do a push up in the water getting extremely wet as my waders were filling up, while doing  my push up. Once I stood up I used my net as a crutch and hobbled up the hill with my friend dragging up my shit. Cold wet and a foot that in my mind is probably broke, we had the fish cleaning guys clean our fish and made our way back to camp kinda beat up and tired.

Day 5

My partner whipped up a breakfast, we threw a loin in the smoker and headed to Travers City to pick up some wine and beer for twin number two. My foot hurt like holy hell but I sure wasn't going to tell my ruthless fricking Buddy's. So off we went hunting a new set of waders and wine and beer from a winery. The whole trip up there, the three of us poked more fun at twin number two for taking us to a gay wine place and down town Travers to buy coffee beans. Made it fun for us but im pretty sure it was greting damn old for him. We all knew we were in trouble when we pulled up to the place and there was a wedding going on there in the front yard, and here comes up cruddy unshaven and fish blood all over my cleanest pair of pants. yeah we fit in.. haha

I thought the bus driver waiting by his bus was going to fall over, when he  heard me ask if we could go to a bar and get the gay off me or possibly thanking him for bringing me to a wine place and making us all now raging homosexuals,lmao. busting each others balls is just part of hanging out with your buddys. " i guess i should think about my phrazing there" ..lol. We got back to camp and waited for two co workers, of horse trailer twin number two, fisherman number five and six. While waiting, captain morgan came out and started flowing. Not sure if it was the captain or what but my foot is feeling great. Once the co workers showed up more booze came out and flowed. Once everyone was greased up really good with all the booze. to much really, to be safe or smart ,so we headed to the river. The captain or the whiskey, not sure really, had pretty much every thing funny to me.my fishing partner said he had no trouble finding me in the dark, i was the only one giggleing like a crazy person . At one point  the captain really messed up my casting rod. so I had to go back to the truck and get a spare. When I came back to find my normally calm fishing parter he had been swarmed by fisherman and was getting mad. I got up beside him as he announced that if I drowned the jack ass beside me in the red hat it would be OK with him. So me and captain morgan, started side casting and shinning my head light in the eyes of red hat till he went way.. haha

Everyone I believe got their limit and we all headed to Andy's bait shop to get our fish cleaned.crazy to me to think about paying someone to clean my fish, but it makes sense at times. 

Day 6

After breakfast we left the horse trailer camp and headed north to bass and walleye fish for a few days.

By the time we showed up unloaded the boat and got to the water I was almost too tired to head to the point. You would have thought I worked all day instead of messed around..lol.

 

We hit the boat by probably five in the afternoon and fished until probably eight. With one or two keepers in the boat we called it a night and headed to dads trailer. Im  pretty sure I ate and hit the bed. All I can remember was waking up the next morning and feeling like I swallowed glass from snoring soo much.



Day 7

The rest of the days are kinda tough to differentiate from one or the other. Each one of us caught our limit a few of those days and each caught a four or four and half pounder which was cool. We fished everyday until Wednesday night decided to go home Thursday because they were calling for rain and we had been wet and cold about enough. We decided to head home and beat the rain. Wednesday night the three of us went in to dicks pour house  which is probably my favorite place to eat in the world, always getting the same thing. Smelt dinners, which is pretty much nothing more than fried minnows.The next morning we got up and it was nice and sunny . Pretty much back to back trip between biking out west and then, backing it up with a fishing trip.It was great but much more costly than i had ever planed . Hopefully next year i can repeat this, with a few lessons learned and much more money, but all and all i would not change a thing. Making it home alittle fater, alot broke'er, and hopefull a touch wiser for next year.

 



sturgis 2012

To summarize my trip out west , I guess I use the summarize, because I'm sure I'm forgetting a bunch.
The first day we rode out to Junction City, Kansas. It was a lot further than I had remembered . The plan was to stay with my nephew Todd, for one, to save some cash, and the other so my wife could spend some time with him, his wife, and kids. On 8/11/12 we rode 893 mile according to my phone GPS history whicc was way to far and too long for Debbie's first big ride of the year. We met Todd at his club house and he was so happy to have company that he just got drunker and drunker, until he was to the point neither one of us really wanted to ride with him across the street. His kids were with the baby sitter and Michal Ann, his wife, had a party to go to and wasn't around long; so Debbie went out to the bike and said she wanted to smoke or something and sent me as text which read and I quote."Lets find a hotel now." so I asked Todd and his buddies.
 One of them called and got us a place to stay at the Hilton  for $70.We told him to book it, and off we went under great protest from Todd .
 He wanted us to sleep at the club house, but i was a positive that my wife was never going to go for such and idea because it was hard to tell what or who had been sleeping or laying in therer and I say that casting no judgements lol. It kinda gave Debbie the creeps knowing that the guy at the desk of the hotel said he had instructions and it was only 70 because it was probably the nicest place either one of us had stayed.
We called Todd the next morning but no one would answer and we didn't want to go to the club house and disturb others, so we hit the road. Todd wanted to meet the next morning for breakfast but he finally called back about noon. So glad we went ahead we would have lost a whole day..

Day 2 we went 1375 miles.  

One of the biggest things I remember about Nebraska was, during lunch we stopped in at a Wendy's and as we waited in line the people in front of us where slow as hell and having trouble with the kids running the store and taking the orders. Debbie and I both stood there just being happy to be off the bike and watched a short, heavy set girl; who collected the food and placed it on the tray, reach down and give her crotch a really big scratching...omg .. Debbie looked at me and whispered, "she just scratched her pussy." For the next 5 min as we waited in the slow moving line the both of us with headaches and red from quietly laughing, the funny thing was the fact the girl apparently was unaware that she had flour on the hands so you could see her tracks of every were she had been itching , bill of the hat , butt, belly and crotch. The more we sat there the harder we laughed. We got back on the road and hit horrific cross winds which was catching Debbie's helmet so bad she looked like a bobble head flopping around in the mirror. As we hauled ass along 2, at times I got up to 100mph, I believe the highway was 2, we were trying to get to alliance before dark. We seen mule deer unbelieveably huge. We stopped and found gas that was like pumping gas in Mayberry. As we stood around taking a break there where wild turkey's walking across the parking lot. 50-75.  We got into a few hills and mountains and my toe shifter fell and I could not down shift at all. We limped it to the nearest hotel and Debbie went in to see if we could find a room and I looked into why the bike wouldn't shift. I got it figured out, but being tired enough it took a long time to figure why the bike would not go back in first until I finally rolled it back and forth, feeling like a dunce, and put it back together.
 She got us a room for $150 at a Holiday Inn Express, can you say price gouging? The place was not really worth it but it could have been a lot worse, so we called it a win and headed out the next morning.
8/13/12 day 3 Monday

We left Alliance and the further north we traveled the better and neater the view seemed to be that day we rode 258 miles . We rode Throug Custer Park, not reallying knowing that it was the Buffalo area, we pulled over to take a picture of a bunch of antelope down in a canyon and Debbie said, "Oh my god, look at that Buffalo!" Unknowingly we had parked right beside a wild buffalo and some how neither one of us seem him as we stopped. Very surreal. We pushed on towards our cabin and as we headed there we noticed that we were passing Crazy Horse Monument and figured we better stop and pull in. Very cool. We finally made it to deadwood koa,very nice and the cabin was like brand new. We unpacked and took the shuttle into town getting some supper and taking in the sites. Thanking the gods of road glides that we could get off the bike for a while.

8/14/12 day 4 Tuesday
Found that the rear brakes on the bike were smoked and the primary chain was slapping the case horribly. So wanting to get it taken care of we went into the hardware store and bought the tools that I forgot to bring and went back to the campground and got the chain adjusted. As I started the bike I began thinking that the the noise should be gone and I found that the noise was actually the shifter that I had rigged and it was just vibrating badly. {well crap} We then rode into Sturgis and found the Harley dealer to see if they had brake pads. Debbie said she could hear the breaks more and more. Sturgis rally was breaking down, tearing down tents, and packing up; but there was still alot of bikes and vender's around.  We found the dealer and got the brakes then walked the streets looking for cheap t-shirts. Both very disappointed in the fact that the foreigner's seamed to have taken over and it seamed to be more like a left over used cheap street fair. We ate dinner at the easyrider saloon, kinda cool.
We made it back to the campground and fixed the brakes, went to Spearfish  Canyon, and the  wonderful Walmart. Can't seem to go anywhere and not make it to a walmart.
8/15/12 day 5 Wednesday

Spent most the day in and around Deadwood kinda taking in the history tour more or less, went to Mount Moriah cemetery where Wild Bill was buried.
8/ 16/ 12 day 6 Thursday
Decided to head home a day early. There was a cold front coming in and the next morn was going to be down to 35-38 degrees and we needed to leave like at 3 in morning if we left Friday, so Thursday morning off we go.
Stopped at Wall Drug, kinda neat, more like a dang road side show. We stopped to take a break along 90 there was a very large sign that said "GAS". Pulled in and it looked like a great place to be skinned, raped, and eaten. I was so distracted by the view I didn't really notice the looks of the place. Debbie was ready to leave as we pulled in. As soon as I looked around , some meth head looking dude or that's what we automatically started thinking... pulled in on the other side of the building and gave us a creepy wave. One look at him and I was . OK! and we are leaving! The next gas station we stopped at and took an extended break, we started talking to an old biker that was full of stories . . He told us that in 1958 he stole a 1946 Indian motorcycle from Long Beach CA, and rode it to Sturgis giving him self a month to get there. He said he spent so much time working on it he barely made it there in time and while he was there someone stole it from him and he had to ride all the way home on the back of some guys hard tail. We rode clear to Sioux City and found a room. 320 mile and it seemed more like 1320. The Kum and Go gas station brought out the maturity level of a thirteen year old kid in me and still makes me laugh at the age of forty two.. haha
8/17/12 day 7 Friday rode 680 miles.
We made up are minds we were going to make it home, one ready to sleep in our own bed and 2 starting to run outta money. Debbie did really good up until the last 200 miles and she was hurting so bad she was starting to shake and it was quickly loosing the fun for her. I felt real bad cause I'm sure she was only pushing her self for my benefit. All and all what an awesome trip and a vacation with just her and I which was much needed. It was like the 2nd one we had ever taken in 15 years, but it has been a few weeks and since then she has been back on the bike and already talking about next years trip.

e publishing and other

Not that i truly believe that my shitty little story have any room for and kinda of professional to even look at. but i have to ask, once you get done with a rough draft and probably the 12th rewrite. what the hell do you do with it then? i mean i like my little story's and i do think other people ,"I'm sure a select few ," would like it too,?it makes me laugh every time i read it , and makes my wife, look at me like I'm  freaky, but as much as an over sharing jackass that i am . I'm not sure i just want to put it out there for some jack wagon, to take my idea. like iv really came up with something..,"that statement make me laugh, but really ,iv worked my hind end off on one, and I'm afraid no one will ever read it even to tell me it sucks. because i sure don't know what to do with it now, other that I'm not happy at all with my ending. on second thought hell no one will probably read this post.. lol, but i guess as long as i enjoy doing it. ill just keep hamming away at creating goof ball stories.

my inner narrator

 

I’m not sure, but i can't be the only person that has noticed the narrator of their self conscious, you know that voice in your head narrating a persons inner monologue that plays in your head, nonstop. well mine i think  Is a bitter old nasty drag queen, and here’s my reasoning. First off she seems to be extremely critical of the way I dress and talk. Yes I wear blue jeans everyday and tee shirts, usually one’s with skulls on them, “because one, they are awesome, and two, skulls make me smile”, and in her drag Queenie  voice, I hear her tell he that forty two year old professionals don’t wear Harley shirts or ever have grass stain pants. Well I’m not the golf shirt, khaki pants wearing type, and the constant grass stains on most every pair of pants I own. Probably should have stopped happening, when I was about ten years old, not forty. But that’s one of the many reasons, why the bitter old babbling queen can shut the hell up.

And   She’ s sure not very brave or adventurous , every time I do anything remotely fun, like ride my Harley, or have a close call , heck just about anything. I hear in my head the most annoying little girl screams. And not in voice of a little girl, more like the voice of a three hundred pound man trying to sound like a little girl screaming.I’d like to tell her to man up but like I said before, the narrator must be a queen.

Or maybe this giant drag queen babbling in my head all the time, Isn’t just a person’s inner narrator of one’s own self conscious? But the sign of an aneurysm or just the first sign of being crazy… lol The world may never know

 

grandma

For some random reason I was remembering my grandma stanley. And a memory that makes me laugh, it was like on a sunday afternoon. the night before I been up all night at house fire. I got off work and it went down to bob's that sunday around noon. I was so tired I was loopy and couldn't sleep. and I proceeded to drink beer with my uncle bob and my friends. a few hours of that I was ready to go home and take a nap. My wife and kids were gone somewhere for the weekend for some reason.so i came right in the house, sat the phone on my chest, in case my wife called.i kicked back on the lazy boy. I was asleep for approximate an hour. The phone rang and it was not my wife it was grandma. I was so tired I wasn't sure who I was talking to but I knew it was grandma Stanley. I'm pretty sure I said hello. and she began go on all kinds of rants. on how my mom did this, mom did that, my sister never see her.no one come's to see her. and  something about a bed. anyway anyone that knows my grandma, what should I say knew my grandma. Knew she took  one breath and then talked nonstop for an hour. I have no idea how long. shortly in the conversation of me listening to her rankings. I fell asleep, how long im not sure but when I woke up she was still talking, and never missed a beat.  She had no idea, The first two times I fell asleep  while she was talking, But the 3rd time. She said hey what's the matter with you, aparantly I was snoring, and she was't sure what the noise was, And that's the only break she took and went on talking.  I. Don't rember the end of the conversation so I apparently did it again. And she never asked me about it..

my short story troubles

upon working  on my little story, i love working on it, but if i try to plan the whole thing out . it just don't work for me? if i make my self just sit down and type away the story leads in all sorts of directions and i really kinda like how its working out .but it seams to take me forever to hammer  more than a page or two at a time . and why  am i suddenly obsessed with this process and doing it . id rather do this than watch TV any day, makes me wonder where the hell this is coming from?